His and Hers Glitter: Dita at Eurovision

HER TAKE:

Psssst, Dita,

Hey, I'm a nice girl who likes to help a sister out, so I have to tell you: Your boobs are showing. They are. A little bit. It’s cool, though. I think I have a safety pin. I don't even think that guy next to you saw anything! Say, by the way, I notice your hooters seem to have a touch of the fairy dust where it counts. And now that we're conspiratorial galpals and we share everything, I have to ask: Can you please give me those pasties? I don’t care if the sticky has already worn off. I will just superglue them onto me. That’s how bad I want diamondboobs.

Here's your chance to help a sister out, Dita. I'm counting on you. Thanks.



HIS TAKE (or Nancy's missed opportunity):

Psst "Alex Swings Oscar Sings!" dude,

Oscar (can I call you Oscar? You must be Oscar, right? Cause you're singing and not swinging), LOVE the pants!! Dita is definitely rocking her sparkle teats and she is a lovely drink of water. But let's talk about you for a moment...bravo. Bravo, I say, at your choice of costume! You and Miss Dita are shining (quite literally) examples of the theory to emphasize your best features. I am happy to tell you that Eurovision finally has seen some class upon it's stage. But Eurovision won't last forever and the whole world (except America, of course [side note: HELLO, can we please air this in the USA, please! Come on! Who do I have to blow in programming to get this on the air?]) has already seen these mirrored beauties, so let me have them. I know that I'd have bit of extra manscaping to do, you know down there, but I think they'd be a big hit at the dog park.