I love your frakin' dress, toaster.

Dear Ellen Tigh, Fictional TV Character from BattleStar Galactica,

Where'd you get that dress? I didn't see any consignment shops on New Caprica. And don't take offense, but you don't strike me as the stay-at-home-and-sew-from-a-Butterrick-Pattern type of gal. (Boozy.)

So where'd you get it?

If you can't come up with a simple answer and, since you are in fact a TV character--a TV character who only looks human but who is really a pale replica of humanity known as CYLON... a CYLON in a wicked hot dress!!-- I doubt you have an answer at all. Then I think you should, you really should fold that frock up neatly and put it in one of those space capsules made out of titanium and have it shipped straight to me, c/o Planet Earth, Human Race, U.S.A! Woot!

Give it to me and my relentless interrogation will stop, Ellen Tigh, and you can get back to your life, whatever that is, because you're not only a fake person who is a robot but you're also on TV which is fake, which means none of this is real.

Except the dress. The dress is all too real.


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